I'm not sure if this is for real or not… but figured, either way, this could earn you an extra point on those "How Hip Are You?" quizzes you get forwarded every so often.

Here's the scoop on a band that Ryan Schrieber (Pitchfork smartie pants) was in 11 years ago as sent to us in a quick email from "JJ" with only a link to No Dessert For You:

Everybody has skeletons in the closet, and the most powerful man in Internet music media is no exception. Jason Josephes, the other half of Pitchfork founder Ryan Schreiber’s mid-90’s Minneapolis basement duo Sissy Boy Slap Party, recently alerted me to the fact that their youthful transgressions were committed to tape and are now available to the world on MySpace. Josephes is also slowly telling the story of how the band was born and trying to explain the inexplicable songs about ugly prostitutes, television themes, and how no one should hit RECORD after an “hour of power” and a handful of mushrooms.

Now, I can speak from personal experience that when you make a living critiquing other people’s music, they’re (not surprisingly) eager to return the favor. I’m all for it – please, go make fun of my band – as those who live in glass houses blah blah blah. That said…

Listening to the songs makes me hope that no one gets hold of any recordings my friends and I made during our 'band' days. Or, if they do, I hope they send them to me since I can't seem to find any of them. In my head, our songs "TSS" and "Cute Mailboy" are classics that would make cub proud! Possibly along the lines that Sissy Boy Slap Party's "In Defense of Prostitution" is timeless bedroom aggro-pop.

Does anyone else have any before-they-were… links to MP3s or MySpaces?