Three Imaginary Girls

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According to, the Associated Press has already written Britney Spears' obituary. Really. As Us tells it:

"We are not wishing it, but if Britney passed away, it’s easily one of the biggest stories in a long time," AP entertainment editor Jesse Washington tells Us.

"I think one would agree that Britney seems at risk right now," Washington adds. "Of course, we would never wish any type of misfortune on anybody and hope that we would never have to use it until 50 years from now…but if something were to happen, we would have to be prepared."

Washington also says the AP has a "pretty extensive obituary operation," and that staffers are "constantly adding people."

I don't know. I'm really, really trying not to be a hand-wringing moralist, but say what you will about Britney (and, trust me, we have), it just seems to me that if the AP has a "pretty extensive obituary operation" they should be able to throw something together once, she actually, you know, dies.

Maybe someone at the AP got inspired by this video and wanted to take some time off and not miss a big scoop.

(Hat tip to HuffPo)